Some oldies but goodies.
Your stall warning plays Dixie.
Your cross country flight plan uses flea markets as check points.
You think sectional charts should show trailer parks.
You've thought of using moonshine as avgas.
You have mud flaps on your wheel pants.
Your toothpick keeps poking your mike.
You've thought about just taxiing around the airport drinking beer.
You wouldn't be caught dead in a Grumman 'Yankee'.
You use a Purina feed sack for a wind sock.
The side of your airplane has a sign advertising your septic tank service.
You constantly confuse Beechcraft with Beechnut.
You think GPS stands for Going Perfectly Straight.
You refer to flying in formation as 'We've got us a convoy'.
Your matched set of luggage is 3 grocery sacks from Piggly Wiggly.
You have a black airplane with a big #3 on the side.
You fuel your airplane from a mason jar.
You've got a gun rack hanging on the passenger window.
You have more than one roll of duct tape holding your cowling together.
Your preflight includes removing all the clover, grass and wheat from the landing gear.
You figure the weight of mud and manure on your airplane into the CG calculations.
You siphon gas out of your tractor to put in your airplane.
You've never really actually landed at an airport, although you've been flying for years.
You've ground looped a Cub after hitting a cow.
You consider anything above 100 feet AGL as 'High Altitude'.
There are parts on your airplane labeled 'John Deere'.
You've never really actually seen a sectional, but have all the Texaco road maps for your area (but they're 20 years old).
You answer all calls from female controllers with 'That's a big ten-four little Darlin'.'
There's exhaust residue on the right side of your aircraft and tobacco stains on the left.
You have to buzz the strip to chase off all the sheep and goats.
You use your parachute to cover your plane.
You've landed on the main street of your town for a cup of coffee.
You fly to family reunions to meet girls.
You've won the 'Bob Wire' award at a spot landing contest.
The tread pattern on your main gear tires doesn't match. Or, there is no tread pattern on your main gear tires.
Your best com radio has 90 channels.
You have fuzzy dice hanging from the magnetic compass.
You have a bale of hay and a hound in the baggage compartment.
Your instructor's day job was at the community sale barn.
You've got matching bumper stickers on your vertical fin.
There are grass stains on your propeller tips.
There is a brown-stained Styrofoam cup strategically stored in the glove box.
The FAA still thinks your mailing address is your parent's house.
You think ZULU time means something to do with Africa.
Your hangar collapses and more than four dogs are injured.
Your airplane has a sticker that says, 'I'd rather be fishing'.
You navigate with your ADF tuned to country music stations.
You think 'Ultralite' is a new beer from Budweiser.
